The "Rush" ans are Coming

This man is frightening. I do wish he would do something about those awful ties and his putrid politics. That such hate and disregard for mankind exists in one human being is beyond me.

Growing up, I always wished that our family was Republican because we wanted to hang onto our amassed millions. Instead our family politics ran down the rigid backbone of the moral majority. 

It wasn't until I was much older that I thought to ask, "Who made you my moral majority anyway?" I don't remember casting a vote.

Then, more than a decade ago, my adult self chose a different party than the one handed to me by my parents. And, every time Rush opens his mouth, I know I made the right choice.

Talk show hosts and commentators on both the right and the left go too far. They have to. It is how ratings are built. They say the things that offend people to the core. But, there is always the danger of going too far. Just ask Howard Stern. Imus. Jimmy the Greek.

Rush mocking the condition of Michael J. Fox. Rush encouraging a parody of Obama to the tune of "Puff the Magic Dragon." Rush saying he hopes Obama fails. (later amended to say "I hope his policies fail.") These are just a few highlights of a career littered with bitterness and pockmarked with pain.

How far is too far? And, when will we say ENOUGH of your silly ties?

Facebook stares back...

My children think I am the biggest dork in the world for having a Facebook (FB) account. And, I might agree with them. It all began when my sister posted the pictures of our visit home last summer on her FB account; and, I created my own account so I could access the photos.

Within in hours of landing in the Facebook world, two dozen folks from my Kingdom past had "friend requested" me. I declined no one. Although, I must admit, it was strange to see the daily (and sometimes hourly) status updates of people with whom there had been little or no contact for years.

"So-and-so is fixin' to take a nap." OR, "Whosit just finished a cup 'o joe."

Then some of my colleagues joined Facebook. Against my better judgment, I accepted their invitations. I am not sure I ever wanted to know that "Whatsername" had a tattoo. THERE.

Something about too much information all the way around made me feel compromised, and I made a graceful exit. Well, it might not have been that graceful. I just deleted the FB account with a defiant push of a button.

Months later, when Ronda and I were doing a search for someone, I reactivated the account to follow a lead. In her cozy living room, we spent a January afternoon crouched over our laptop screens creeping through Facebook and "googling" like madwomen. People searches sure have changed since the days when she had to call every "Wright" in the D.C. area phone book to find the person who might know something about someone.

With my FB account back up and running, more friend requests rolled in. My own "mumma" is on Facebook. She POKED me last month. It cracked me up to read her status update, "Paulette just finished practicing some hymn variations on the piano." Love, love, love her.

I will confess that I have directed people in my "real world" to join my LinkedIn network if they ask to keep in touch with me. Somehow mixing the unpredictable land of social networking, full of Superpokes and cow flinging, with my professional standing doesn't sit right with me.

And, there is another reason. Although I avoid joining FB causes on either side of the aisle, there are many of my FB friends who are members of causes that lean a bit more to the right than I do. This makes me nervous. (as stated in a post that I did pull down out of respect to my more conservative husband)

And then there are the gifts connected to causes...

"Would you put this dust bunny in your dust bunny garden and send me one back? Together we can stamp out leprosy."

At first blush, you might ask, what is the harm in participating? No one wants anyone to suffer from leprosy; and dust bunnies are cute. However, if you choose to accept the innocuous dust bunny, you will find that you are agreeing to terms of service that require a morning sacrifice, your first born, and access to all the friends in your network.

FB applications are invasive by design. The first thing they do is load your entire address book and ask you if you want to invite anyone else to join. Once you have established your network, FB bleeds through the cyber layers to present you with a list of "people you might know." And, the truth is...you do know them. FB morphs you through six degrees of separation faster than you can say, "Bob's your uncle."

The straw that broke my FB back came this morning when I signed on to discover that I was now friends with "Christian Freedom." I scratched my FB head and tried hard to remember when I had accepted this request. Upon investigation, I discovered that "Christian" was married to my cousin, Karen.

D'oh. Jim Jacobson, Karen's husband, my former Sunday School teacher, and originator of the friend request in question, had changed his name to Christian Freedom, AFTER I had accepted his invitation. Call me a curmudgeon, but I was not (I am not) happy about this. Isn't "bait and switch" illegal?

Beware when you stare into Facebook, for when you stare into Facebook, it stares back at you. And, it WILL get your stuff when you least expect it.

Splinters of Self

It is difficult to take a picture of one's self. There are those who seem to do it with the greatest of ease. I am not one of them. Have I mentioned that I love Jayna?

What's On Your Bookshelf

I have noticed recently that people are fond of participating in Book Meme thingy-bobs. I too participated, but refrained from posting my results. Of 100 books on one list, I had read 71. That number should really be higher than 71 because technically the Chronicles of Narnia are more than one book. Most of the titles that I checked off are ones that I read before I turned 25.

The exercise made me want to start my own book list--What's On Your Bookshelf? This would be a list of books that you have read in the past three months. My list would look something like this.

1. Jesus Land by Julia Scheeres. A raw memoir of a girl who grew up in a whacky world of fundamentalism gone awry.
2. When You Are Engulfed in Flames, essays by David Sederis.
3. Best Friends by Martha Moody
4. Compulsion by Jonathan Kellerman
5. When Katie Wakes by Connie May Fowler. Another autobiography.
6. The Book of Jeremiah
7. Scarpetta by Patricia Cornwell

These are just books that I have read recently that I can REMEMBER. I have been known to read a book and promptly forget the main character's name and everything else about it.

One of my favorite books of all time is, Surprise Party by William Katz. As books go, I think it is fairly obscure, but it twists and somersaults its way to the best "who-dun-it" endings that I can recall. ("Recall" being the operative word.)

I liked it so much when I first read it that I bought a copy and sent it to my dearest friend, Ronda. It was before Amazon.com. I had to actually order it over the counter at Walden Books.

Amazon link to Surprise Party by William Katz

Leave and Cleave

I suppose I married far too young. Nothing could make this any clearer than when I look at my own daughter who is just two months shy of her twentieth birthday and the same age I was when I said "I do" back in 1986.

What was I thinking? What were my parents thinking? Does it matter now what any of us were thinking? Jim and I were in love. Our hearts were full of youthful passions, ideals and dreams for the future when we stood together that day under the warm smile of the Michigan sun promising each other forever in front of my father the minister and a crowd of 300 witnesses.

I've always said that we fought as hard as we loved during those first years together. Our personalities clashed daily. I remember he once told me that I made him crave four-letter words more than anyone else in the world. And, I believe it. I could be difficult when my ideals squared off with reality...and lost.

With maturity's hard-won hindsight, I can see now that we were both going through the process of "leaving and cleaving." I have heard younger souls romanticize the Biblical admonition to "leave and cleave." The truth is...leaving your youthful ideals can be painful; and, the process of blending two strong wills is not the stuff of fairy tales.

As we made it through those first few years, our hearts did grow together. We learned what was important, and what to let go. We worked together to achieve some basic goals: college--for me; a new car--a Chevy Celebrity; a house--we signed papers right after I turned 21; and children--Jayna was born right before I turned 23; and, Jared was born four and a half years later.

Since that time, the trajectory of our lives has twined us through things we never knew we would have to face. Things that left us far apart, and things that brought us back together when we least expected it. Up out of the rubble has grown a fierce mutual respect. And, for me, that is love.

Last week I had my annual physical. As part of routine screening, my nurse practitioner asked, "How are things with you and Jim?"

My answer might have been more candid than she expected, but it was the truth.

"We are partners in this business of life."

And, I realized that was the truth. Does my heart skip a beat when he walks into the room? Not really. Do I sometimes look at him and feel overwhelmed with the dearness of this man I call friend? Absolutely.

Last night we went out for a Valentine's Day dinner at Denny's. Why Denny's you might ask? One of our first dates was a breakfast supper. I think a stray bit of my former idealism hoped to grab a meaningful memory from our shared past.

As we sat across from each other in the booth, no giddiness crackled through the air. Instead, the space between us was filled with the companionship of 23 years; and, our easy conversation was punctuated with stretches of comfortable silence.

When the waiter came over to the table, I ordered breakfast-- two eggs over-easy, hash browns and pancakes.

He ordered...a hamburger, medium-rare, with onion rings.

My Valentine's idealism bristled for only a moment...this was supposed to be a breakfast supper. And, then I smiled.

Leaving and cleaving, as it turns out, is the process of a lifetime.

In which the truth is revealed...

Haiku2 for daughterofdivagation
seek a merciful restoration of a buzz word. bite the lessons.
Created by Grahame

Swish you were here

So, so you think you can tell Heaven from Hell,

blue skies from pain.

Can you tell a green field from a cold steel rail?

A smile from a veil?

Do you think you can tell?

And did they get you to trade your heroes for ghosts? 

Hot ashes for trees?

Hot air for a cool breeze?

Cold comfort for change?

And did you exchange a walk on part in the war 

for a lead role in a cage?

How I wish, how I wish you were here.

We're just two lost souls swimming in a fish bowl, year after year,

Running over the same old ground. 

What have you found? The same old fears.

Wish you were here.

Lyrics: Pink Floyd (photo courtesy of J. J. LaFontaine)